the road of wanting

never had i hoped that this day would come
eventually so it did
care for others i would if i know
that this would come
love for other i should if i still have the time


i couldnt find my way back as i am at lost
i couldnt find anyone around as of now i am void
i couldnt find the energy to walk further as my leg trembling with fear
i couldnt find the will to move on patheticly how i find myself with


here i am on an empty vast plain space
the sun was so high up in the sky
with its blazing heat
laughing at the weak me
wishing and waiting for me to fall onto earth at any time soon
engulfed with fear i am now
as my feet can no longer support the body
fading away i am fading
the vision rendered is utterly useless
what hope i had left
to survive this catastrophe
or is it i am the cause of this disaster to even begin.
yet here i am still standing, pushing away any reason for logic.
alone wanting hoping
that this wont come.

#01 as light dim forward, one's eye begin to blur. shadows follow no longer. sure enough that bed and pillow i meet soon after.

help !!!!

1+[(5v+u)(e+1)]+5v(e-1)-ue =


-.-"


please leave the answer in the comment section :)

a never ending CYCLE

The never ending cycle will now commence,

The sun shines bright, As the day begin anew,

Eye that was still shut, Open once again,

The dizziness was still stuck in the head,

Look around to know the time,

Hoping it is still long hours to go,

Despair that felt, the bed was now released from its misery,

The heavy feeling still dwelling within,

The body was dragged along the corridor,

Entering the wash room,

Yet, clueless as it should,

Looking around, wondering where it is that I stand,

With fair ‘n lovely on my left,

Toothpaste and toothbrush on my right,

Refresh, indeed I feel refresh,

Soon after, despair comes next,

There are classes that need to be attended,

And the promise I have vowed, that need to be fulfilled,

With BISMILLAH & Doa Iftitah,

The journey that I sought, The journey to become an engineer,

Shall soon take its shape,

Classes begin as early as the sun shines,

The lecture was boring, yet I wasn’t sleeping,

Notes I jotted down,

Exercises given was thoroughly done,

To prepare myself to the final that will soon meet,

Ready as I should, this shouldn’t be a problem,

When I had endeavoured to the best of studies,

Games and plays shall never be forgotten,

As I lay bored at my bed doing nothing,

Hoping that the day will bloom on its own,

It is a fine and beautiful day. What could bring me harm ??

has the JOURNEY i sought begin to move ?

I might have change slightly not too much though but I did sort of change not the way I look or brought myself to society. But worry not as I am still the man you once knew. I never actually change, it just that I add in new features. So in the year future, you might find me to be more welcoming, friendly, I smile often and such forth. Life is too short not to feel them. 

So I think im enjoying my life even more here in UiTM, Pulau Pinang. As I have more to time to do stuffs like reading my manga as I see fit, reading my novels im about to finish 2 of my novel in less than 2 months :). I studied more, I read, I played more. But still, I found I have more times than I ever have when I was a form 5 or even a stpm candidate. Haha. So its quite funny how I managed my time when I was before. As of now, I have plenty of time to revise, to study, and to do stuff. Hehe, im quite happy being here. Glad to be here in fact, lots of things I have learned and so many more to be and soon will learn. 

So here I am writing my blog using Microsoft word to check my grammar :P heheh. Ive been reading lately and these two books I read was indeed spectacular. So much anticipation, I can hardly close it and do other things but I have to if not I wont be able to finish up what I must. And im onto Shakespeare, I already asked one of my friends to buy me that book and she did. Im going to fetch it when Im going back to KL. Im looking forward to read it soon.


I still find it hard to study PHYSICS, quite stressful. -.-“ and haha still struggling though!  Urghhh, ya Allah please open my heart and clear my head to receive Your knowledge. AMIN. Mathematics is ok, other subjects for now is still within grasp. Lots of reading I need to finish up so I wont get too preoccupied. CTU 101, MEC 131, but not as much as SPTM so I hope I can manage!


This month is fasting month. A month that we muslim and I as Islam should be looking forward to. I have been doing good stuff lately, despite my headache and my chest hurts as god knows how it feel. I have been feeling very much alive and good. So for those who are asking or wondering or don’t even care. Im doing perfectly fine here. Don’t be such a worrywart because it wont look cute on you :P im living my life here, so you should do yours. 

Remember that for whatever happen in the future don’t blame yourself if you have tried your very best but the results you had isn’t good enough. REDHA and BERSYUKUR, theres always a reason, a hikmah to what had unfold. Think of it like this, you studied your ass off to get a straight A’s in STPM or SPM or a 4.0 GPA but you couldn’t get them. You had given your best is it not enough?? I wonder, you see. Maybe in the near future if you get the results you always wanted you will become someone arrogant, someone who will forget your creator, someone who is not who you should be, or someone that you will become. So don’t worry if you failed once, twice, or many times after. Relax derr.. Allah kan ade :) berdoa, bertawakal, and put your effort to the very best. insyaAllah things wouldn’t go for the worse.

Firman Allah SWT (QS An Nahl : 12) :

“Dan Allah telah membuat suatu perumpamaan (dengan) sebuah negeri yang dahulunya aman lagi tenteram, rezkinya datang kepadanya melimpah ruah dari segenap tempat, tetapi (penduduk)nya mengingkari nikmat-nikmat Allah; karena itu Allah merasakan kepada mereka pakaian kelaparan dan ketakutan, disebabkan apa yang selalu mereka perbuat”

Firman Allah SWT (QS:Al ‘Ankabuut: 40)

“Maka masing-masing (mereka itu) Kami siksa disebabkan dosanya, Maka di antara mereka ada yang Kami timpakan kepadanya hujan batu kerikil dan di antara mereka ada yang ditimpa suara keras yang mengguntur, dan di antara mereka ada yang Kami benamkan ke dalam bumi, dan di antara mereka ada yang Kami tenggelamkan, dan Allah sekali-kali tidak hendak Menganiaya mereka, akan tetapi merekalah yang Menganiaya diri mereka sendiri”

Until next time :D